1978 - Malaysia Schools Rugby Champion

King Edward VII School, Taiping is a school rich in rugby tradition. Till today, it is still perenially amongst the elite in schools rugby in the country. Rugby was played at the school as far back as 1923. However, in 1978 after one and a half decades of playing bridesmaid to Malay College Kuala Kangsar in Perak schools rugby a transformation happened that made KEVII the kingpins of Malaysian schools rugby till today. Currently, KEVII is the reigning Premier Schools Rugby Champion. The following exchanges 2 years ago in my EGroup tell the story:

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From: Cheahs
Sent: Thursday, April 21, 2005 3:21 PM
Subject: KEVII Beat MCKK

Received SMS from Raja Omar Ikram. Our rugby team beat MCKK, 26-12 at Teluk Intan yesterday to take the Perak schools title. Apparently, they wanted a neutral venue. They may have celebrated a grand centenary this year, what with all their well conected and privileged old boys but once again The Tigers have spoiled their party! Congratulations to the team!

Cheah

MAGNI NOMINIS UMBRA

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Thong wrote:

Great news, bro! And now, the M'sian schools championship...we didn't win again since 1978, did we?

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Sent: Thursday, April 21, 2005 6:13 PM
Subject: Re: KEVII Beat MCKK

I was at that game in 1978. The only girl in the bus all the way to KL. What a game it was. Great news today, hope they're enroute to re-create the spirit of 78.

SF

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From: Cheahs
Sent: Thursday, April 21, 2005 9:58 PM
Subject: RE: KEVII Beat MCKK

SF,

It is heartening to be reminded of your keen interest in rugby at KE. As a matter of fact I do remember seeing you at the games. The KL trip your referred to was probably in 1979. I do not remember any trip to KL for rugby except for the trip to Kuala Terengganu via the Karak Highway.

1978 was rugby revival year for KE. We won the national championship after beating RMC at the MCKK ground. In the Perak state championship we beat Andersons in the final at Ipoh after accounting for MCKK along the way. We played all our interstate games away. The Terengganu game was against Sultan Sulaiman School in the semi-final. After beating them we were elated to hear that the final was to be in KE. Unfortunately, RMC requested a neutral venue and we sportingly obliged. The Tigers Den is a feared place for visiting teams. I think the school chartered 13 buses for the trip to Kuala Kangsar.

Thong,

You were a pillar in the 1978 team as well as in 1979 and 1980. I believe KE was also state champions in 1979 and 1980 but lost to MCKK 0-4 in 1981; am I right? I remember watching you guys beat VI in KL in 1979 or 1980. This was probably the KL trip referred to by Suet Fun. I also watched KE beat touring Vajiravudh of Thailand and St Andrews of Singapore.The 1979 team had a wonderful backline compared to the less fancy but efficient backs we had in 1978. The 1978 team had a very good pack led by Mizi Mahmud.

I think after 1978 the MSSM change the inter-state format to having combined-schools state teams. Though KE players dominated the Perak teams back then, it was never the same again. Tell us about all that Thong.

Cheah

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From: Fadhil
Sent: Monday, April 25, 2005 10:52 AM
Subject: Re: KEVII Beat MCKK

dear edwardians,

perhaps this is an opportune time to introduce myself. The name is choong voon leong now known as Muhammad Fadhil Choong. same batch as raja omar ikram, mah siew sian, Hwang Thiam Hwa, Khairul Najmi etc but was spirited away to RMC in 1978 after Form 3. I was at the historic RMC/KE match at MCKK and was quietly pleased that KE beat RMC. KE was a formidable team then if you knew the calibre of the RMC players.

Thong, we were in the same Under 15 badminton team together with Loong Seng. I was playing doubles and we were ably trained by your father. Remember?

regards,
voon leong

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Sent: Monday, April 26, 2005 2:55 AM
Subject: Re: KEVII Beat MCKK

Hi Fadhil, glad you finally posted. I was just on the phone to Mike Naser Taib this morning. He was a former president of the Old Putra Association and founder member; also a Tiger before he went to RMC like you. Somehow the Tiger Spirit does not fade and as they say, "Once A Tiger, Always A Tiger"! He is trying to spark off something for the OE Association in KL; something along the lines of perhaps the Tigers Den that was discussed here a few weeks back. As a matter of interest I am forwarding a brief he wrote to Tun Ling recently....from one OP to another (2 ex-OPA presidents at that); discussing not about RMC but KE7!!

I am in touch with many Tigers who are also Old Putra. You may know some of these names; Bashah Harun, Shaharuddin "Badak" Ariffin, Mohd Sofian Arshad,....they too remain Tigers at the core. Being Raja Omar's batch you would be 3 years my junior. The diminutive Raja must be one of the best scrumhalves KE ever produced and he was bloody resilient; seen him take big hits yet seemingly unhurt.

The historic RMC/KE match at MCKK. I was fortunate to be a member of the KE team. What a game it was! KE was the underdog and we knew the RMC team was a very good side. They had scalped Johor English College, SDAR or King George V of Negri and also I think Malacca High School. These were traditionally strong teams. We were quietly confident and felt that if we played to our full potential, we could beat any schools side in Malaysia at the time. Though we were told that the RMC boys were big, we were totally not prepared for what we saw! They looked like bloody adults!! Something I have to say is that hundreds of fellow Tigers who were there to support simply made it such that we had to win! Losing was not an option and personally, it would have blighted my entire time at KE as an unerasable black mark if we had lost that game.

Though the memory may have faded somewhat, the recollection of the emotions remains as if it was just yesterday. Since you also watched the game I would like to take this opportunity to tell the story behind this victory. It was unfortunate that for RMC to have met this KE team. We were a determined side and the fitness and weight training we had since the previous December made us a tough team to play. Our secret weapon was our coach, Pak Yiew.

In the decade preceding 1978, all we had was a rich tradition in rugby and little else. We had our share of "stars" but as a team we used to be whipping boys for the likes of MCKK, Sultan Abdul Hamid College, and STAR. Play was unimaginative, usually characterized by "up-and-unders" and chasing the wind! Defence was porous and it was a rarity for the ball to reach our wingers because of bad handling. We were tactically naive and our coaches were equally clueless!

I remember very clearly in October or November of 1977. Pak Yiew who had just taken over as rugger coach (after performing a fantastic job with the athletics team) called a meeting of senior players for 1978. He had the audacity to suggest that we would be Malaysian champion in 1978 and that was our target! Mind you, the players who attended the meeting were in the side that lost to SGI that year! I recall being at the back of the classroom with Mizi Mahmud and Shahrir sniggering and remarking "Pak Yiew ni gila!"

Pak Yiew built the backbone of the 1978 team with boys from the 1977 U-15 team and the remnants of the 1977 U-20 squad. He also recruited selected Upper 6 boys who were totally new to rugby because he wanted maturity to blend with the mainly fourth formers. Notable amongst these "novices" were Ng Chee Keong who was a sprinter in Pak Yiew's athletics team and Tan Poh Hong. Chee Keong's was a natural winger and with his speed, scored many tries during the campaign. Poh Hong was a wing forward and together with 16 year old Yusuf Mat Ariff, we had a pair who gave opposition flyhalfs and scrumhalfs hell. All three were also fierce tacklers. Fadhil, you probably will recall your contemporaries who were in Form 4, Zainal "Bochart" Abidin, Yusup "Gila" Mat Tais, Roslan Ibrahim, Lope Ahmad, Kuldip Kumar, Wan Baharin, and of course Raja O and Yusuf Mat Ariff. Those in Form 5 in 1978 were Loong Seng, Thong Chee Meng, and Zul Akmal. You probably also know Jalil Sha'aib who was in Lower 6.

35 players were selected for training which started during the December holidays. Each was paired with another of equivalent size and that was it for the season. I cannot remember the number of times I have carried Zul Akmal on my shoulders and running the length of the rugby pitch and vice versa. The focus until end February was on fitness and strength. We never saw a rugby ball before then. Pak Yiew made sure we had strong necks and backs. When the rugby balls first came out all we were allowed to do with them was passing. In March and April, we were drilled on basic skills; passing, receiving, tackling and interestingly enough, no kicking. Sometime in April, the scrum machine came out and by then we basically had 2 squads. That was when we got to play a bit of rugby! The forwards were put through the most strenous routines on the scrum machine, the rolling mauls, the rucks, lineouts, etc, etc. The three quarters (backs as they are called today) had their own drills of which tackling and handling were the focus. The two squads eventually became the 1st fifteen and the backup fifteen as sparing partners. Not all of us could be assured of a first team place.

For 1978, Pak Yiew's strategy was possession rugby. For this the mainstay of our game were the forwards. Punting the ball was virtually taboo. We had a strong pack in the scrums, with speedy wing forwards on the break. Mizi Mahmud, playing hooker was truely an inspirational pack leader and captain. Thong was our No.8 and of course he developed into arguably the best anchorman in the country during the 80s. Loong Seng and "Ironman" Hussein were the props.

Our backline were no pushovers too. Flyhalf Shahrir and his merry men! Jalil and Shaharuddin Latiff at centre and Bochart and Chee Keong the wingers. Lope Ahmad was a great fullback. It was a joy to watch them scoring at the corner flags after stringing passes right to the wingers. Lope often provided an added dimension as the extra man in attack. The ball handling drills meant that our forwards could also double up as backs!

Pak Yew taught us to play textbook rugby and kept things simple. Most importantly, to play as a team. The buzzwords were, "Cover and Counter-cover".....it was that simple! Yet, it was this that made us appear a team of more than 15 players on the pitch. We swamped most of our opponents. The other important thing was that we were a team of tacklers. It was difficult for teams to cross our try line.

The team was not allowed to play matches until May. As a first test, Pak Yiew let us play against Taiping Artillery Garrison of which we won by 9-0 I think. That was the game I saw Mizi carrying the ball and up-ending a muscular soldier by charging low into him head first.

Next Pak Yiew pitted us against the Police Field Force (Northern Brigade) who were the police force champions. We thrashed them and they lost their temper. Imagine policemen punching schoolboys! Following that, what was supposed to be a 3-test series with the Taiping Tigers ended after the second game. The first was the traditional present boys versus old boys game on the Friday before Sports Day. The Taiping Tigers did not have enough uninjured players after the 2nd game.

The shrewd Pak Yiew purposely chose adult opponents to harden the team and also build confidence. After that we were tested in 2 friendlies with Bukit Mertajam High School and Sultan Abdul Hamid College. The scores were 51-0 and 25-0 respectively. By the time we played Vocational School in the first district match it was a basketball score of 102-0. Then came the SGI game in end-June. Our team had scored more than 200 points with virtually no reply by then and we thrashed them 41-0 chalking up 3 penalty tries in the process. Georgy Porgy was collar-grabbing!

I believe the toughest game of the year was with MCKK. We had not beaten them in 15 years and the psychological advantage they had over us was obvious. This brings me to a ploy by Pak Yiew that really showed his mettle. Before the game, he showed up with a big bottle of clear water. With a serious look on his face, he remarked that it was "air jampi" and only muslim players could take a sip. Others who ate pork were forbidden to drink the water. The water was supposed to put "fire" in the muslim players and he said had been blessed by a powerful bomoh in Cangkat Jering! You guessed right, the water came right from the tap near Pak Long's office!

MCKK too had a very good team with a backline of jinkers. However, a backline cannot score without the ball! Our wing forwards were instrumental again. But this game was Shahrir's game! His conversions and the solo try he scored ensured that we won the game 26-12. Maybe it was the water.............. :o)

In the Perak final we met Andersons. This team had 5 players in the Perak senior side at the time and were fresh from a rather convincing victory over defending state champs STAR. We knew quite abit about them because Pak Yew was from there before he moved to KE. Their well known coach was a Mr Chan Ah Chye who also happened to be the coach of the Perak senior team. We beat them on their home ground, 19-6.

Compared to RMC, our interstate games were easy. Kedah gave us a walkover because we had already beaten Sultan Abdul Hamid College in the earlier friendly but BM High School wanted another try and our team comprising mainly reserves beat them 15-4.

The relatively narrow score line was not reflective of the overall control we had in the game. We beat East Coast champions, Sekolah Sultan Sulaiman of Terengganu, 18-0 to earn the right to play RMC in the final.

Against RMC, our worry was that our team had peaked too early. Our interstate games were relative easy ones and we knew RMC had to win through a few tough opponents. Our strategy was to deny them the ball as far as possible, but this was no easy task as they were much bigger. It was almost comical to see the comparison between the physique of the 2 teams.

Ours were shorter but stocky and they were tall and muscular. I believe they tried to intimidate us from the first whistle and we had to take some big hits. Our forwards played their hearts out, dishing out our own brand of hard rugby. In the first half, it was the RMC scrumhalf that let his team down and it was Raja Omar who tricked him twice into an offside position. The 2 resultant penalties gave us a 6-0 lead before RMC equalised with a converted try. A Shahrir penalty restored our lead before halftime.

I remember Pak Yiew firing up the forwards during the halftime break. By then we knew we could match RMC in terms for brute force and in the second half the forwards show greater aggression. It was heartbreak to lose Mizi through his recurring knee injury in the second half but his cover, Roslan Ibrahim was more than a equal replacement. He scored our only try barging through near the corner flag. Shahrir added 3 more penalties against a sole RMC penalty to make the score 22-9 in our favour.

So Fadhil, that was part of the 1978 story. In 1979, the team was even better and more technically accomplished. With Jalil leading a team of "veterans" it was no wonder they conquered all before them. They also had Huzir Mohamad who was a reserve winger in 1978 but blossomed thereafter. Huzir later went on to captain the Malaysian senior side for a few years. Raja Omar and gang took KL by a storm in later years and they formed the backbone of the Anchorman team then. Thong, Mizi, Shahrir and Jalil played for their respective universities and I think Thong had a stint with Cobra later. I believe in the mid-80s, half the Malaysian senior side were OEs. In fact, in 1980 I watched an HMS Malaya Cup game at the STAR ground between Selangor and Perak. The Selangor side had all the national stars including Malaysian captain Boon Hoon Chee, flyhalf Tan Soo Chong and winger, Lim Say Tee. All were at the peak of their playing careers. The Perak side comprised OEs from the 78 and 79 school sides and also included some schoolboys. Perak whipped the Selangor arses!

What did I learn from all the above? I learned one of life's valuable lessons: No matter what or who you are up against, prepare well and have confidence in your own abilities. Virtually nothing is impossible to those who believe!

Cheah

MAGNI NOMINIS UMBRA

D-Day, 6th of June

Today, 6th of June is D-Day. Nope, it is not because Pak Lah confirmed the "open secret" that he is getting married again. Anyway, congratulations to the soon-to-be newly weds.

The moment in history that is of far greater significance and consequence was 6th of June, 1944; the "Longest Day". It was the beginning of the end of World War II in Europe when the Allied Forces successfully launched "Operation Overlord"; the assault on Hitler's "Fortress Europe" which became known as the "Battle of Normandy".

There is so much information on the www regarding that day in history that it is superfluous for me to include URLs here. Go check it out.

The objective was simple: to gain a foothold on the continent while the Soviet Union tied down a great portion of the enemy's forces. The road to Berlin thereafter was a matter of time

Now, more than 60 years later, the Normandy invasion remains the largest seaborne invasion in history, involving almost 3 million troops crossing the English Channel.

Friendship - Chapter from "The Prophet" by Kahlil Gibran

From my falling apart copy given by a dear friend, Linda Khoo 25 years ago, to the numerous websites (http://leb.net/gibran/) today, "The Prophet" has always been a good "reference text" for me.

If I am not mistaken, the book was banned by the Malaysian government for a number of years.

Here is the chapter on Friendship:

And a youth said, "Speak to us of Friendship."

Your friend is your needs answered.
He is your field which you sow with love and reap with thanksgiving.
And he is your board and your fireside.
For you come to him with your hunger, and you seek him for peace.
When your friend speaks his mind you fear not the "nay" in your own mind, nor do you withhold the "ay."
And when he is silent your heart ceases not to listen to his heart;
For without words, in friendship, all thoughts, all desires, all expectations are born and shared, with joy that is unacclaimed.
When you part from your friend, you grieve not;
For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.
And let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.
For love that seeks aught but the disclosure of its own mystery is not love but a net cast forth: and only the unprofitable is caught.
And let your best be for your friend.
If he must know the ebb of your tide, let him know its flood also.
For what is your friend that you should seek him with hours to kill?
Seek him always with hours to live.
For it is his to fill your need, but not your emptiness.
And in the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures.
For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed.

Psychiatry & Psychology? Narcissism & Attention-Seeking Personality Disorders-They Are More Common Than You Think!

UPDATE: 2nd November 2009

"St Catharines ttcs" commented in this blogpost as follows:

"Funny reading your blog. "Birds of a feather flock together", as the old saying goes. Studing human nature has been my thing for some time; so that wood perhaps put us in the same boat, maybe at different ends, but the same boat.If you are tryung to sell yourself or somthing you should perhaps try not using so many "I's". It reall take away from what you are trying get across. When ever I write, 1 "I" is aloud, thats it. If it can't be done with more than one "I". It is scraped. It is muck more enjoyable to write and at the same time making it a little more challenging. Good rant though!"

My reply was:

"Touché Catherine. Using the "I" word does make me seem narcissistic huh. I too am very self-conscious about using "I" for your same reason but in this case, it was intentional to show it was just my opinion as a layman.

No, not trying to sell myself or anything; just a salesman's rant ;o)

Being on different sides of the same boat is good; perhaps it would keep the boat on even keel. Cheers!"

She has a very good point so I must concede by re-writing the original stuff in blue as follows (without a single "I"):

To me, psychiatry and psychology are not exact science. As a layman, who can blame me for thinking that at best, they are a result of extensive statistical analyses and at the very least, they are based on armchair research and postulations that require further experimental testing; case in point being Mr. Maslow. Judging from the movies (what else!), diagnoses are mainly symptomatic based and treatments seem to lay somewhere between lobotomy or Prozac and a sympathetic ear.

Many non-medical people probably share this "narrow" perception and there is not much a psychiatrist can show me that will make me change my opinion. Yet, having always been interested in human behavior the quest for that elusive formula to help me fathom the human psyche continues.

My cynical view is that qualitative techniques in psychiatry are at best "guesswork" and quantitative methods are fallible; certainly not enough to classify me as demented. It is all so easy to classify a person who exhibits extreme behavior that strongly deviates from accepted social norms as being mad but what about cases that are not so obvious? This should be the real area that the psychiatrist is supposed to earn his spondoolies.

But wait a minute! Most of us with some intelligence and diligence (especially through self-study and discussion) can also guess with a great degree of accuracy another individual's behavior patterns. Most of us can lay claim to some common sense and intuition that excludes us from having to consult psychiatrists or psychologists for that matter; we can still function effectively in a social environment!

For example, having learned to recognize character and behavior patterns in people enables me to be rather categorical in slotting all and sundry into neat "mental pigeonholes". Getting to know an individual better merely makes me put him into another pigeonhole or leave him where he is. Though still a long way from being able to attach exact labels to the "categories", nor is it my intention to do so (that would make it no different from formal psychiatry), this simple method is effective enough for me to reasonably predict behavior and reactions to a satisfactory degree of accuracy. With that, it is not a problem for me to operate effectively in my immediate environment.

As mentioned earlier, notwithstanding what my thoughts on the field of psycho analysis are, it does not preclude me from still trying to learn more about the human mind and corresponding human behavior. Trawling the Net for interesting articles and logical explanations is still a favorite pastime and having found one such article on narcissism and attention-seeking personality disorder (which indeed seems rather common; most of us can recognize it in ourselves or in those around us in various degrees but perhaps not in the extreme), sharing it here would be appropriate:

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I do not suppose psychiatry and psychology are exact science. As a layman, I am tempted to think that at best, they are a result of extensive statistical analyses and at the very least, they are based on armchair research and postulations that require further experimental testing; case in point being Mr. Maslow. Judging from the movies (what else!), diagnoses are mainly symtomatic based and treatments seem to lay somewhere between lobotomy or Prozac and a sympathetic ear.

I am sure many non-medical people share this "narrow" perception and I dare say, there is not much a psychiatrist can show me that will make me change my opinion. Yet, since I can remember I have always been interested in human behavior and looking for that elusive formula that can help me fathom the human psyche.

Being the cynic, I tend to view qualitative techniques in psychiatry as "guesswork" and quantitative methods as being fallible; certainly not enough to classify me as demented. It is all so easy to classify a person who exhibits extreme behavior that strongly deviates from accepted social norms as being mad but what about cases that are not so obvious? I suppose that is the real area that the psychiatrist is supposed to earn his spondoolies.

But wait a minute! Most of us with some intelligence and dilligence (especially through self-study and discussion) can also guess with a great degree of accuracy another individual's behavior patterns. Most of us can lay claim to some common sense and intuition that excludes us from having to consult psychiatrists or psychologists for that matter; we can still function effectively in a social environment!

For example, I have learned to recognize character and behavior patterns in people around me and have become rather categorical in slotting all and sundry into neat "mental pigeonholes". Getting to know an individual better merely makes me put him into another pigeonhole or leave him where he is. Though I am still a long way from being able to attach exact labels to the "categories", nor do I intend to (that would make it no different from formal psychiatry), I have found this simple method effective for me to reasonably predict behavior and reactions to a satisfactory degree of accuracy. With that I can operate effectively enough in my immediate environment.

As I mentioned earlier, notwithstanding what I think of the field of psycho analysis, it does not preclude me from still trying to learn more about the human mind and corresponding human behavior. I still trawl the Net for interesting articles and logical explanations and I found one such article on narcissism and attention-seeking personality disorder which I think is rather common. Indeed, most of us can recognize it in ourselves or even those around us in various degrees and probably not in the extreme. I would like to share this article as follows:

(A) Narcissistic Personality Disorder
The serial bully displays behaviour congruent with many of the diagnostic criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Characterised by a pervasive pattern of grandiosity and self-importance, need for admiration, and lack of empathy, people with narcissistic personality disorder overestimate their abilities and inflate their accomplishments, often appearing boastful and pretentious, whilst correspondingly underestimating and devaluing the achievements and accomplishments of others.
Often the narcissist will fraudulently claim to have qualifications or experience or affiliations or associations which they don't have or aren't entitled to. Belief in superiority, inflating their self-esteem to match that of senior or important people with whom they associate or identify, insisting on having the "top" professionals or being affiliated with the "best" institutions, but criticising the same people who disappoint them are also common features of narcissistic personality disorder.

Narcissists react angrily to criticism and when rejected, the narcissist will often denounce the profession which has rejected them (usually for lack of competence or misdeed) but simultaneously and paradoxically represent themselves as belonging to the profession they are vilifying.

Fragile self-esteem, a need for constant attention and admiration, fishing for compliments (often with great charm), an expectation of superior entitlement, expecting others to defer to them, and a lack of sensitivity especially when others do not react in the expected manner, are also hallmarks of the disorder. Greed, expecting to receive before and above the needs of others, overworking those around them, and forming romantic (sic) or sexual relationships for the purpose of advancing their purpose or career, abusing special privileges and squandering extra resources also feature.

People with narcissistic personality disorder also have difficulty recognizing the needs and feelings of others, and are dismissive, contemptuous and impatient when others share or discuss their concerns or problems. They are also oblivious to the hurtfulness of their behavior or remarks, show an emotional coldness and a lack of reciprocal interest, exhibit envy (especially when others are accorded recognition), have an arrogant, disdainful and patronizing attitude, and are quick to blame and criticize others when their needs and expectations are not met.
The DSM-IV Diagnostic Criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder are:A pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, lack of empathy, as indicated by at least five of:
1. a grandiose sense of self-importance
2. is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
3. believes that he or she is "special" and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
4. requires excessive admiration
5. has a sense of entitlement, i.e. unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
6. is interpersonally exploitative, ie takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
7. lacks empathy and is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
8. is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
9. shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes

(B) Attention-seeking personality disorders, victim syndrome, insecurity and centre of attention behaviorDrama queens, saviors, rescuers, feigners and attention-seekers
The need for attention
Human beings are social creatures and need social interaction, feedback, and validation of their worth. The emotionally mature person doesn't need to go hunting for these; they gain it naturally from their daily life, especially from their work and from stable relationships. Daniel Goleman calls emotional maturity emotional intelligence, or EQ; he believes, and I agree, that EQ is a much better indicator of a person's character and value than intelligence quotient, or IQ.
The emotionally immature person, however, has low levels of self-esteem and self-confidence and consequently feels insecure; to counter these feelings of insecurity they will spend a large proportion of their lives creating situations in which they become the centre of attention. It may be that the need for attention is inversely proportional to emotional maturity, therefore anyone indulging in attention-seeking behaviors is telling you how emotionally immature they are.

Attention-seeking behavior is surprisingly common. Being the centre of attention alleviates feelings of insecurity and inadequacy but the relief is temporary as the underlying problem remains unaddressed: low self-confidence and low self-esteem, and consequent low levels of self-worth and self-love.

Insecure and emotionally immature people often exhibit bullying behaviors, especially manipulation and deception. These are necessary in order to obtain attention which would not otherwise be forthcoming. Bullies and harassers have the emotional age of a young child and will exhibit temper tantrums, deceit, lying and manipulation to avoid exposure of their true nature and to evade accountability and sanction. This page lists some of the most common tactics bullies and manipulators employ to gain attention for themselves. An attention-seeker may exhibit several of the methods listed below.
Attention seeking methods
Attention-seeking is particularly noticeable with females so I've used the pronoun "she". Males also exhibit attention-seeking behavior.

Attention seekers commonly exploit the suffering of others to gain attention for themselves. Or they may exploit their own suffering, or alleged suffering. In extreme forms, such as in Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy, the attention-seeker will deliberately cause suffering to others as a means of gaining attention.
The sufferer: this might include feigning or exaggerating illness, playing on an injury, or perhaps causing or inviting injury, in extreme cases going as far as losing a limb. Severe cases may meet the diagnostic criteria for Munchausen Syndrome (also know as Factitious Disorder). The illness or injury becomes a vehicle for gaining sympathy and thus attention. The attention-seeker excels in manipulating people through their emotions, especially that of guilt. It's very difficult not to feel sorry for someone who relates a plausible tale of suffering in a sob story or "poor me" drama.
The savior: in attention-seeking personality disorders like Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy (MSBP, also known as Factitious Disorder By Proxy) the person, usually female, creates opportunities to be centre of attention by intentionally causing harm to others and then being their saviour, by saving their life, and by being such a caring, compassionate person. Few people realise the injury was deliberate. The MSBP mother or nurse may kill several babies before suspicions are aroused. When not in saviour mode, the saviour may be resentful, perhaps even contemptuous, of the person or persons she is saving.
The rescuer: particularly common in family situations, she's the one who will dash in and "rescue" people whenever the moment is opportune - to herself, that is. She then gains gratification from basking in the glory of her humanitarian actions. She will prey on any person suffering misfortune, infirmity, illness, injury, or anyone who has a vulnerability. The act of rescue and thus the opportunities for gaining attention can be enhanced if others are excluded from the act of rescue; this helps create a dependency relationship between the rescuer and rescued which can be exploited for further acts of rescue (and attention) later. When not in rescue mode, the rescuer may be resentful, perhaps even contemptuous, of the person she is rescuing.
The organiser: she may present herself as the one in charge, the one organising everything, the one who is reliable and dependable, the one people can always turn to. However, the objective is not to help people (this is only a means to an end) but to always be the centre of attention.
The manipulator: she may exploit family relationships, manipulating others with guilt and distorting perceptions; although she may not harm people physically, she causes everyone to suffer emotional injury. Vulnerable family members are favourite targets. A common attention-seeking ploy is to claim she is being persecuted, victimised, excluded, isolated or ignored by another family member or group, perhaps insisting she is the target of a campaign of exclusion or harassment.
The mind-poisoner: adept at poisoning peoples' minds by manipulating their perceptions of others, especially against the current target.
The drama queen: every incident or opportunity, no matter how insignificant, is exploited, exaggerated and if necessary distorted to become an event of dramatic proportions. Everything is elevated to crisis proportions. Histrionics may be present where the person feels she is not the centre of attention but should be. Inappropriate flirtatious behaviour may also be present.
The busy bee: this individual is the busiest person in the world if her constant retelling of her life is to be believed. Everyday events which are regarded as normal by normal people take on epic proportions as everyone is invited to simultaneously admire and commiserate with this oh-so-busy person who never has a moment to herself, never has time to sit down, etc. She's never too busy, though, to tell you how busy she is.
The feigner: when called to account and outwitted, the person instinctively uses the denial - counterattack - feigning victimhood strategy to manipulate everyone present, especially bystanders and those in authority. The most effective method of feigning victimhood is to burst into tears, for most people's instinct is to feel sorry for them, to put their arm round them or offer them a tissue. There's little more plausible than real tears, although as actresses know, it's possible to turn these on at will. Feigners are adept at using crocodile tears. From years of practice, attention-seekers often give an Oscar-winning performance in this respect. Feigning victimhood is a favourite tactic of bullies and harassers to evade accountability and sanction. When accused of bullying and harassment, the person immediately turns on the water works and claims they are the one being bullied or harassed - even though there's been no prior mention of being bullied or harassed. It's the fact that this claim appears only after and in response to having been called to account that is revealing. Mature adults do not burst into tears when held accountable for their actions.
The false confessor: this person confesses to crimes they haven't committed in order to gain attention from the police and the media. In some cases people have confessed to being serial killers, even though they cannot provide any substantive evidence of their crimes. Often they will confess to crimes which have just been reported in the media. Some individuals are know to the police as serial confessors. The false confessor is different from a person who make a false confession and admits to a crime of which they are accused because of emotional pressure and inappropriate interrogation tactics.
The abused: a person claims they are the victim of abuse, sexual abuse, rape etc as a way of gaining attention for themselves. Crimes like abuse and rape are difficult to prove at the best of times and their incidence is so common that it is easy to make a plausible claim as a way of gaining attention.
The online victim: this person uses Internet chat rooms and forums to allege that they've been the victim of rape, violence, harassment, abuse etc. The alleged crime is never reported to the authorities, for obvious reasons. The facelessness and anonymity of the Internet suits this type of attention-seeker.
The victim: she may intentionally create acts of harassment against herself, eg send herself hate mail or damage her own possessions in an attempt to incriminate a fellow employee, a family member, neighbour, etc. Scheming, cunning, devious, deceptive and manipulative, she will identify her "harasser" and produce circumstantial evidence in support of her claim. She will revel in the attention she gains and use her glib charm to plausibly dismiss any suggestion that she herself may be responsible. However, a background check may reveal that this is not the first time she has had this happen to her.

In many cases the attention-seeker is a serial bully whose behaviour contains many of the characteristics listed under the profile of a serial bully, especially the Attention-Seeker. The page on Narcissistic Personality Disorder may also be enlightening, as may be the page on bullies in the family.

Feigning victimhood is common to serial bullies and this aspect comes to the fore in most cases once the bully has been held accountable and he or she cannot escape or rely on their support network. The tactic of denial followed by immediate counterattack followed by feigning victimhood is described on the serial bully page.
Attention seeking and narcissism
Like most personality disorders, narcissism occurs to different degrees in different people and reveals itself in many ways. Many business leaders exhibit narcissism, although when present in excess, the short-term benefits are outweighed by long-term unsustainability which can, and often does, lead to disaster.

The need for attention is paramount to the person with narcissistic personality disorder, and he or she will do anything to obtain that attention. Over the last two years, the fastest growing sector for calls to the UK National Workplace Bullying Advice Line has been from the charity/voluntary/not-for-profit sector. In most (although not all) cases, the identified serial bully is a female whose objective is to demonstrate to the world what a wonderful, kind, caring, compassionate person she is. Bold pronouncements, a prominent position, gushing empathy, sitting on many committees for good causes, etc all feature regularly.

However, staff turnover is high and morale low amongst those doing the work and interacting with clients. In each case, the relief of other people's suffering changes from an objective and instead becomes a vehicle for gaining attention for oneself. In some situations, more money is spent on dealing with the consequences of the serial bully's behaviour (investigations, grievance procedures, legal action, staff turnover, sickness absence etc) than is spent on clients

THE NEW ZEALAND ALL BLACKS RUGBY HAKA

The New Zealand Maori haka is a dramatic dance, first used as a form of distraction. The words spoken during the dance are important but should not be taken out of context, nor without taking note of which tribe is using it. So it can be difficult to just look at the words alone and try to translate the words to English.

Often the haka is seen as a war dance, but that is not always so. As mentioned above, it can be used to distract the viewer, as a welcome, a challenge, or a show of defiance. It may also be used to create a high level of excitement in the performer, as seen when the All Blacks rugby team performs the haka.

The most famous All Blacks haka is the Ka Mate! Haka composed in the early nineteenth century by Te Rauparaha, a famous chief of tribe Ngati Toa. The words relate to a moment in time, when Te Rauparaha is climbing out of a kumara pit, where he was in hiding from pursuing warriors.

On 27 August 2005, the All Blacks rugby team performed a new haka at Carisbrook in Dunedin, against the Springboks rugby team. This new haka does not replace the traditional Ka Mate haka, but will be used by the team when and if they find it appropriate.

The new haka, called Kapa O Pango (Team in Black) came about because the All Blacks rugby team felt they wanted a haka that represented who they were and where they were from. The team is multicultural, and some of the actions have a Polynesian influence.

The haka was composed by Derek Lardelli, from Ngati Porou. He has asked that people take particular note of the throat-cutting gesture at the end of the haka, performed particularly dramatically by halfback Piri Weepu. The gesture symbolizes the intensity of first-class rugby and the consequences of defeat.

Here is the All Blacks Ka Mate! Haka with English translation:

A ka mate! Ka mate!
'Tis death! 'Tis death!
Ka ora! Ka ora!
'Tis life! 'Tis life!
Ka mate! Ka mate!
'Tis death! 'Tis death!
Ka ora! Ka ora!
'Tis life! 'Tis life!
Tenei te tangata pohuruhuru
Behold! There stands the hairy man
Nana nei i tiki mai whakawhiti te ra!
Who will cause the sun to shine!
A hupane! A kaupane!
One step upwards, another step upwards!
A hupane! A kaupane!
One step upwards, another step upwards!
Whiti te ra!
The sun shines!


The words of the All Blacks Kapa O Pango Haka with corresponding English translation:


Kapa o pango kia whakawhenua au i ahau!
Let me become one with the land
Hi aue, hi! Ko Aotearoa e ngunguru nei!
This is our land that rumbles
Au, au, aue ha!
And it's my time! It's my moment!
Ko Kapa o Pango e ngunguru nei!
This defines us as the All Blacks
Au, au, aue ha!
It's my time! It's my moment!
I ahaha! Ka tu te ihiihi
Our dominance
Ka tu te wanawana
Our supremacy will triumph
Ki runga ki te rangi e tu iho nei, tu iho nei, hi!
And will be placed on high
Ponga ra!
Silver fern!
Kapa o Pango, aue hi!
All Blacks!
Ponga ra!
Silver fern!
Kapa o Pango, aue hi, ha!
All Blacks!


This is a YouTube Clip that shows first the Ka Mate Haka led by captain Taine Randell and then the Kapa O Pango Haka led by succeeding captain, Tana Umaga.

Enjoyyyy!!!!

For more information, you could check out this Wikipedia URL:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haka_of_the_All_Blacks#Performance

A recent controversy involving the haka was:

The now infamous "Handbag Haka" which was shown on Australian TV and was used to promote an upcoming Tri-Nations Test match between the Wallabies and the All Blacks. The following is the YouTube clip followed by a copy of a newspaper article:

An Australian TV advert portraying New Zealand rugby players carrying women's handbags has upset the All Blacks. The advertisement shows the All Blacks players performing the haka challenge carrying computer-generated handbags. It refers to an incident when former captain Tana Umaga broke up a fight by hitting fellow All Black Chris Masoe over the head with a woman's handbag. "It's insensitive, I think, to Maori and disrespectful of the All Blacks," said assistant coach Wayne Smith. Mr Masoe, who was allegedly reduced to tears by the blow, was later fined NZ$3,000 (£1,000) by the New Zealand Rugby Union. The incident generated considerable media coverage and sparked jokes at the All Blacks' expense. The handbag went on to fetch NZ$22,750 ($13,650, £7,500) in an online auction. The television advert is promoting Saturday's Tri-Nations Test between New Zealand and Australia in Christchurch. Australian coach John Connolly told local radio he had not seen the advertisement yet.

NZ All Blacks Season Opener Against France At Eden Park, Auckland

Here we go again! Test rugby season is on again and culminating in the Rugby World Cup (RWC) in September 2007.

2007 RWC host nation France played the All Blacks at Eden Park, Auckland last Saturday and Bernard Laporte's side came away knowing their work will be cut out for them come September. As expected, the All Blacks won but the 42-11 scoreline belies the 77% territorial domination in the scrappy season opener that promises the return to last year's awesome form as the season progresses.

The All Blacks ran in 5 tries against Le Bleus on a night that saw icons Dan Carter and Ritchie McCaw taken off at half-time.

Tsem Rinpoche-Young, Unconventional....Refreshing

This was in today's Sunday Star. Interestingly, the unconventional Tsem Rinpoche is based in Petaling Jaya where he is the resident lama (teacher) and spiritual director of Kechara House Dharma centre.

I do not normally read stuff like this but since I noticed it was written by the daughter of a dear friend of My Witch, I read it. The thing that struck me most about Tsem Rinpoche was not his youth nor his Male Model good looks but what he said about being spiritual and spiritual practice:

“Spiritual practice is a change of attitude,” he points out in his book of collected teachings Nothing Changes, Everything Changes, “It has everything to do with us changing – how we perceive people, how we react to people, how we talk, our emotions, happiness, anger, delusions, jealousies, successes, motivations, enthusiasm – and the beauty is that nothing around us changes.” Look out for it in the article below.

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Lama's brand new approach By JAMIE KHOO

Not all monks are dull, humorless ascetics in saffron robes and here’s Tsem Tulku Rinpoche to prove it.



Tsem Rinpoche giving formal dharma teachings at his centre in Petaling Jaya.


2 am, and I am driving around Kuala Lumpur’s dark, dank Chow Kit streets with Tsem Tulku Rinpoche and some of his students. He’s making us play the “pick game” where we must choose between any two of our most feared or disliked scenarios and people.

So here we are peering out the windows to spot transvestites, prostitutes and the homeless, the people that most of the city is oblivious to, or doesn’t want to know.

Tsem Rinpoche, resident lama (teacher) and spiritual director of Kechara House Dharma centre in Petaling Jaya, often speaks candidly about wanting to bring spirituality to “the people who nobody else wants.”

Much in the spirit of new-generation lamas like the controversial Singa Rinpoche, who was recently banned from entering Taiwan, and Dzongsar Khyentse Rinpoche, who doubled up as director of the internationally-acclaimed movie The Cup, Tsem Rinpoche kicks dharma (spirituality) out of the cave and into the much more vigorous, defiant and hedonistic 21st century world.

He promotes a “brand” of spiritual practice that doesn’t require any compromise on who we really are. His diverse mix of students is evidence enough of that. Dharma talks at Kechara House find local fashion personalities sitting on the floor next to award-winning singers, college students, high-powered business women and KL’s socialites as well as former drug addicts, gamblers, manic depressives and self-confessed bad boys from gangs. With Tsem Rinpoche, you start where you are.

Even the fact that Malaysia does not have a predominantly Buddhist mass consciousness doesn’t faze him. Instead, he actively promotes the strong inter-religious and racial harmony here.
“We are fortunate to live in a country where the Government gives us the freedom to do as we like (as long as) we follow the law.’’

Tsem Rinpoche’s gurus from Gaden Monastery in India sent him to Malaysia in 1992 to teach as they felt it would be most beneficial for people in this region. He currently lives full-time in KL. He started Kechara House in 2000.

“Dharma centres serve as places of education for Buddhists to become better citizens of a country, not to make other citizens Buddhist,” he explains.

In inspiring a younger generation, he is incredibly candid about himself: “Look! Do I look holy? Do I look disciplined? Do I look like a ‘high holy Tibetan lama’? No! I am you; I think like you and have the same problems as you.



Tsem Rinpoche instructing his students in the courtyard of Kopan Monastery in Nepal.


“If you like to eat, then eat! If you like having sex, then have it! If you like nice clothes and jewellery, buy and wear them! I want the freaks, the people who can be themselves. Live with the motivation of being kind, change your minds, but also play computer games, have sex, party. What’s wrong with that? We’re not Buddhas yet,” he points out, realistically. “The important thing is to keep your motivation good, clean, straight.”

Tsem Rinpoche, 41, embodies this balance himself, and is willing to try unconventional methods of reaching out and appealing to people, especially the younger generation.

That was how he became a runway model for about a month in 2004, working with Catwalk Productions (owned by Ming Chan, who is one of his students) and singing in karaoke sessions with his students. He is also on YouTube (which has brought visitors from as far as Australia and America to him in KL).

He cites the Dalai Lama, Mother Teresa and Gandhi as among his favourite people for their outstanding messages of peace and kindness; but also Madonna, Ru Paul (which perhaps explains Tsem Rinpoche’s entertaining diva-like antics during his sermons and talks) and Bette Davis for “their determination and strength.”

Though Tibetan Buddhism is famed for exotic rituals and high tantric empowerment, Tsem Rinpoche prefers to stress on the importance of mind transformation teachings (lojong), focusing most ardently on developing “basic” qualities of compassion, kindness, generosity, patience, effort and wisdom.

His central teachings are based on The Eight Verses of Thought Transformation composed by Tibetan saint and scholar Geshe Langri Tangpa which concentrates on changing our perspectives on the world and people around us.

Tsem Rinpoche will soon be releasing Compassion Conquers All, a book of teachings which deals specifically with the Eight Verses and how to apply it practically within our lives. “Spiritual practice is a change of attitude,” he points out in his book of collected teachings Nothing Changes, Everything Changes, “It has everything to do with us changing – how we perceive people, how we react to people, how we talk, our emotions, happiness, anger, delusions, jealousies, successes, motivations, enthusiasm – and the beauty is that nothing around us changes.”

Often, he speaks of depression and the mental afflictions that so often plague the 21st century, and thus, the corresponding need to apply spiritual transformation and practice to turn our minds towards a more peaceful place.




Tsem Rinpoche giving a traditional greeting to Gaden Shartse Monastery Abbot, Ken Rinpoche.





"We have everything that we need – technology, comfort, convenience. Physically, we’re not suffering anymore but so much suffering now happens within our minds.”

The “suffering” he refers to is not necessarily what we commonly regard as great pain, but includes daily frustrations with family, career and relationships, our strong attachment to and expectations of things and people, and the corresponding struggles we face when there is unexpected change or disappointment. The lojong, thus, cut across religion or cultural barriers by offering an alternative philosophy of living that can be applied variously in our lives.

By now, it’s past 3am and the “pick’’ game is over. When I ask him why he never lets us pick between nice things, he replies: “Those things and people aren’t inherently disgusting themselves. They’re only disgusting because you think they’re disgusting. And until you give up those hang-ups, I’ll keep making you pick!”

There are buttons to be pushed, and Tsem Rinpoche makes sure yours are thoroughly flattened. After all, it is only in the truly unexpected that we learn – and just as Chow Kit's roads seem an unlikely lesson, it’s actually just been yet another journey through our own untempered minds.

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Finding his own peace

A young Tsem Rinpoche in the 1980s with his guru, Kyabje Zong Rinpoch.


TSEM Tulku Rinpoche, a US citizen, was born in Taiwan to a Tibetan father and a Mongolian mother. His mother is of royal lineage that has been traced back to Genghis Khan.

When he was just seven months old, monks from a nearby monastery identified him as the reincarnation of a high lama but his mother refused to allow him to be taken for monastic training. She said if that was true, he would find his own way eventually.

That turned out to be prophetic. His parents had separated before he was born, and his mother, who found it difficult to raise him on her own, gave him to a foster family. (He re-established contact with his father 15 years ago but not his mother.)

At the age of six, he emigrated to New Jersey, United States, where he lived with another Mongolian foster family. There, he suffered incredible abuse and continuously faced extreme opposition from his foster parents to his strong inclination towards dharma practice. Going to the temple would often result in physical beatings for days and being banned from socialising with friends.

At 16, after the abuse had led to several attempts at suicide and escape, he eventually ran away, hitchhiking across the United States to Los Angeles, where he finally joined a dharma centre. Still, he enjoyed going out to LA’s hottest clubs, received offers to model and even an opportunity from Paramount Pictures to act.

His guru, Kyabje Zong Rinpoche, advised him that although he would be successful in America, his work and practice would be more beneficial if he went on to study in a monastery. The young man was ordained as a monk by the Dalai Lama. He was just 22 years old. He later went on to study at one of the largest monastic universities in the world, Gaden Monastery, in India.

The many years of training and study have helped him come to terms with his painful past. During a recent talk, he shared with his audience what he went through: “My (foster) mother was full of anger and sometimes she would ignore me for weeks, or she would beat me for hours, first with her fists. When she got tired, she would get out the brooms and mops. It was very scary to live in a house like that with so much anger. And I know she is actually a nice, really kind lady. It’s just that when the other side takes over, she’s very different.

“Later, when I was studying with Geshe Tsultrim Gyeltsen at Thubten Dhargye Ling centre in LA, he taught me that I had to let it go. He told me to call my mother and say sorry. I said, ‘Why?! She abused and beat me! I didn’t do anything.’ “He said, ‘You didn’t do anything now but you must have done something in your previous life time to get this. Either you accept karma or you don’t.

“ ‘If you want to practise dharma, if you want to gain attainments and you want to progress you have to accept that it’s your karma. You have to let it go. You need to look at the positive things and not just the negative. You’re here learning dharma in the centre due to her kindness.’ “After listening to my teacher, I realised that I had created the karma myself. Geshela asking me to apologise was the Buddhist way of healing.”

Throughout his spiritual journey, he has had the good fortune to study under 14 prominent teachers in the Tibetan tradition – including the Dalai Lama, world famous healing Lama Gangchen Rinpoche and Kyabje Zong Rinpoche – and now strives solely to share these teachings with others.

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Controversies and commendations

OVER the years of teaching in Malaysia, Tsem Tulku Rinpoche has received compliments along with criticism, especially from within the Buddhist community itself.

He finds himself the centre of heated discussion in both local and international Buddhist Internet forums where participants endlessly question why he dresses in lay clothes and why he has hair.

Rumours in circulation include that of him being disrobed, using powerful magic and being kicked out of his monastery. His unconventional “crazy wisdom” teaching methods are constantly under scrutiny, largely because his style is so contrary to what is practised by the Mahayana and Theravaden traditions prominent here.

Feeling the urgent need to explain the phenomenal growth of dharma, lamas, and teachings to the outside world, and to help facilitate the spread of dharma teachings, Tsem Rinpoche recently published Gurus for Hire, Enlightenment for Sale, a book that deals specifically with the issues of dharma centre-and lama-bashing.

In his case, he was given permission by his gurus to wear lay clothes for the simple reason that it would be easier and more effective for doing dharma work in South-East Asia.

One of his gurus, prominent healing lama, Gangchen Rinpoche, said during a recent private audience with some of us: “The way a guru acts, talks, dresses is to fit in with everybody here so that we can learn dharma, practise, and laugh together. Even if the great Shakyamuni Buddha appeared today, he wouldn’t appear in his normal guise (but in) the look that pleases people today.

“The teacher must resemble the students. It is not only a physical resemblance but a character, or expressive way of resemblance. This way, it’s much easier for the dharma teachings to go in,” he explains.

As further endorsement of his teaching methods, books recently written by Tsem Rinpoche have received forewords from high lamas like Gaden Shartse Monastery Abbot, Ken Rinpoche, and the head of the Gelug school of Buddhism, Gaden Tri Rinpoche who is second only to the Dalai Lama. As dharma teachings and books hold an especially important place in the Buddhist tradition of learning, debate and study, this official support of his work is especially significant.

Tsem Rinpoche rises above all the criticism and tells his students to focus not so much on the outer appearances of the teacher, but on his teachings. “It’s okay if you don’t like the things I do. But listen to the teachings – which come from an unbroken lineage from Buddha – and check whether they can benefit and bring more happiness to your own lives and the people around you,” he advises.

And, as Buddhism so heartily encourages its disciples to check things out for themselves before they take anything on, this makes far more sense than the rumours themselves.

Too Many Choices?

We are told one criteria that makes humans highly differentiated from non-human animals is the ability of discerning choice.

Well great! So we are the undisputed King of the Jungle and we lord it over every other life-form on the planet! We decide which species becomes extinct and which gets genetically modified to better serve the human race in one way or other. Mother Nature is not too pleased and has allowed an affliction to creep into the our being that will eventually restrict our lives; limit our choices. It would be poetic justice indeed, as this affliction has to do with being overwhelmed by too many choices!

The era we live in, more than any preceding era offers the individual vast number of choices in virtually every facet of life. For material goods alone, the mind boggling myriad of varieties makes us like kids in a candy store! What about when we wrestle with questions of who we marry or whether we marry or divorce; which religious faith to follow or not to follow, or whether to adopt "New Age" spirituality; career choices; etc., etc., as we rush through a life of short term gratification and selfish values? So many choices; choose something, value nothing!

We are continually motivated by others saying we are anointed by this great ability to choose and that because of it, we are the ones in control! We are bombarded with "wise" sayings like; "we are today the sum total of our choices", "we choose the emotions we feel", "even the times when we are the beggars, we chose to be", "we chose the people in our lives", "our ability to choose never ends!", "we must choose to be in control of our lives, or someone else will", "we must have free will!"; WE CHOOSE!!!! Woe to those who say they have "no choice"!!

Well, you know what? Today, the most important influence in both our personal lives and indeed our culture is that we have too many choices, and the fact that we have to make those choices. We cannot escape from being transformed in how we live, how we think, and who we are.

We are getting increasingly paralyzed by having too many choices yet choices need to be made. When we do make the choices, we can always justify our choices to ourselves no matter how wrong a decision yet, there is always that little nagging voice of doubt. The multiplicity of choices has made us polarized and spawned acute dualism, paradoxes, dilemmas, contradictions and regrets.


Against the fabric of increased affluence but decaying moral standards and declining religious influence, this makes for a potentially dangerous cocktail. A seductively intoxicating cocktail made more potent by the discovery that sometimes we can indeed have our cake and eat it. This may eventually lead us towards anarchy or a breakdown of society as we know it today. It will start with the detioteration of family values and familial relationships; people will increasingly be able to find substitutes.

What is driving this great explosion of choices? It is information communication technology! It is the Internet, it is your and my handphone, it is the television, etc. It is globalization and the branding wars, it is the curse of easy consumer credit; it is the demand for more and more information, it is the demand for free will!

The Nocturnal Mind?

The word "nocturnal" according to the New Oxford Dictionary of English means, "done, occurring, or active at night: e.g. most owls are nocturnal".

The definition that I mean according to the same dictionary for the word "mind" is: "the element of a person that enables them to be aware of the world and their experiences, to think, and to feel; the faculty of consciousness and thought: e.g. as the thoughts ran through his mind, he came to a conclusion people have the price they are prepared to pay settled in their minds".

Why then "Nocturnal Mind"? Personally, the necessity for me to have a pro-active diurnal mind necessitates an active nocturnal mind. When do I draw the line between night and day is the choice I make every day. I would not want the Sun and nor any Moon to have their say!

I would define my "night" as being when most people around me are asleep. This is when my mind is most active; hence "the nocturnal mind". For years, my "nights" have been long yet not at the expense of my "days" and this has been possible because the few hours of sleep that I need is hardly ever punctuated and disturbed by dreams.