Today is supposed to be Jeannie's 49th birthday. As I write this at 5.00 am in the morning, it feels as I felt before many a time in the past; writing letters to Jeannie in the wee hours. Only this time, I cannot place the letter at her bedside table for her to read when she awoke. It is the first time in 23 years we are not celebrating her birthday together.
It will be exactly one year come 12th July since you went home. I am left with the hope that we will meet again. These past months have been so lonely for me yet you have made them bearable. You have made it easier for us to let you go through the memories you left behind; in ways that only Krystyn, J.J., Prince and I will know. Yet, my Darling we still yearn for your physical presence, your laughter, your touch, .... your love. You live within each of us now my Darling, and we would like to assure you that your lessons are not in vain.
Krystyn; dear Krystyn, is the daughter you have always wanted her to be and there is nothing I can add here that can say more. My Darling, our children have your special qualities and they are shining through the darkness that began with the dimming of your life force as you prepared for home.
J.J. has grown so much this one year Darling, and you can rest assured you have nurtured a solid young man that he is becoming. When my time comes, we can take comfort that the Cheah name will be carried forward proudly and capably as we have a son who is well grounded in the family values you taught him so well. He knows his roots.
Our wonderful Prince Cheah has been the receptacle you left with us to receive and contain in your place, the overflowing abundance of love we feel for you. Amazingly, he has given us back even more than we share with him. We love him as we have loved you and we spoil him as you have spoilt us. Darling, you left him with us because you knew what would be.
My Love, we will be moving to a new house soon and we will have a special place for you there. It would not be our home otherwise. We know you check up on us ever so often and though we feel your presence so strongly, the coincidences you conjure up tell us it is unmistakably You.
Darling, we won't celebrate your birthday this year or in future, but we will celebrate your life everyday of our lives by living and being as you would want us. We love you Mummy."
Darling, you did it again!! Coincidence??? Your number!! 627!!!!!
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